Often using pseudo science, shaming and blaming to suggest those who’re stuck as friends are unattractive losers, and those who don’t want a relationship are manipulative, or money grabbing.The main reasons people end up in unsatisfactory friendships are linked to a lack of confidence, communication problems and a fear of rejection.Step Five: When you want someone to be more than your friend Check (as much as you are able) if the person you like is in the market for a relationship. Make it clear you would like to go on a date, not just hanging out doing ‘friend stuff’.Move on if they say no to a date, or if things aren’t working out for you (or them).Focusing on those factors may be more useful than learning tricks or techniques to persuade someone who’s just not into you to change their mind.
If issues around long-term illness, mental health, chronic shyness or disability are making it difficult to meet people and establish relationships, Outsiders is there for you. Enjoying hobbies, broadening interests, eating well, and getting support from friends and family can stop you obsessing over potential relationship issues and make you feel more grounded.
Petra Boynton is a social psychologist and sex researcher working in International Health Care and studying sex and relationships. Please note that by submitting your question to Petra, you are giving your permission for her to use your question as the basis of her column, published online at Wonder Women.
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The Big Short, the film adaptation of Michael Lewis' book of the same name about the causes of the financial crisis, opens in UK cinemas this weekend.